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Yours.
"The other night I cried." She whispered one night, when they
were both huddled together under the blanket, trying to warm
themselves enough through the winter night.
"Really? Why?" He answered casually, like he always did.
"Don't know why. I just did."
"Hmm..." He replied. "People usually have a reason for crying,
right? I'm sure you had one too, you probably just forgot it by
now."
"You think so?" They were both quiet for a few seconds, the only
noises coming from their bodies brushing against the bedsheet.
"Does everything really need a reason?" She continued.
"Huh?"
"I mean, people just do stuff sometimes, right? Without reason?"
"I guess... But crying is kinda different, I believe."
"Really? Why?"
"Well..." Ryo scratched his head as he tried to put his thoughts
into coherent words. "It's kinda because crying is kinda like an
extreme emotion, like something that you wouldn't casually do
all the time. It's like happiness, something always triggers it,
and you become happy, nobody becomes happy just because..." He
paused as he looked up towards the ceiling. "I kinda forgot what
my point was."
She giggled at this, and brushed herself on him.
"Have you ever been night swimming?"
"Huh? No..." She replied.
"We should do it one night, when it gets warmer."
"Sure. What's so different between swimming at night then at
day."
"Don't know..." He paused. "I kinda like it better, for some
reason, to be swimming in the darkness. It's like shutting the
world away and just having this nice little space for yourself.
I guess you could say that it's kinda like that 'returning to
the womb' feeling or something, where you feel safe, because you
feel sheltered from the world, and everything is just much
better because of that feeling."
"Hmm..."
"I don't know, maybe I'm just weird." He laughed at himself. "It
feels melancholic, peaceful, as if everything is right, when
you're surrounded by nothing but darkness, and all that you can
hear is the water waves moving back and forth, back and forth."
He looked at her. "I must be boring you with all this nonsense,
huh?"
She smiled. "No, not at all. It sounds really interesting."
"I think that's the token phrase used when you're bored and are
just being polite to not hurt the other person's feelings."
She smiled again. "Why are you always so cynical and paranoid
about everything."
"I don't know, maybe it's just my nature."
"Maybe you should realize that I really do mean what I mean, and
that maybe I'm not lying?"
"I don't know." He replied. "Because then some of the mysticism
would be gone, I guess."
"Mysticism?"
"Never mind, let's sleep."
"No, come on, tell me what you-"
"Too bad, time's up, time to sleep!"
He would fake sleep, she would try to wake him up, and the game
would continue on for hours. He always hid his feelings like
that, and maybe he thought this little game would make her
forget about it. She never did. And she still longed for the
answers long after the days were gone. |
