Unknown, Unnoticed



            The date didn’t feel the way I had expected it to. I thought as I walked through the silent streets, my head down in confusion, watching the grayness of the sidewalk. A car passed by, flashing its light into the darkness, hoping to see more than what its eyes allowed it to.

            I had felt so excited when Sean said yes, felt so happy when I called Ron to tell him about it, yet… When it had happened, I felt no warmness stirring inside my chest. I felt nervous, not delighted, even though I had dreamed of this date for so long, since I first fell in love with Sean, back in Junior High… Or was I in love with Sean? I wondered as I walked though those familiar avenues, my destination too well known for me to miss.

            Why had I sat down with Ron that day? As I watched Sean practice in the field, something I had done for weeks before the game. I could have just stood near the wired fence, watching as I always did, wishing for Sean to notice my heart, my love. Yet I sat down near Ron, talking, wondering more about him.

            I guess I figured out why, as I stared for the first time into Sean’s eyes, our hands touching in that fated way. I felt no warmness as I saw his brown eyes, felt nothing as our hands touched, briefly. I guess my heart already knew whom she belonged to, I was just too stubborn to admit.

            I looked up at the stars as I reached my destination, still unsure about what to do next, or the things I should say to him. I knew Ron lived alone, in a house owned by his dad, who never came back since Ron’s mom died of a mysterious disease. He still sends Ron money, and talked to him on the phone once every month, yet he never came back to the house, cursed by the memories of his diseased wife.

            My mind raced as I approached his door, glimpsing into the words I should say, the way I should act. I was too confused then, mystified by the ways of life, as I slowly tried the doorknob. It was unlocked, as I slowly opened the door, still thinking about the words I should say…

            And then I saw it, my eyes wide open, shaking as the vision came. I quickly closed the door, as quietly as I could, before I ran crazily away from there, crazy for nothing, crazy for myself. I came too late, there was nothing else I could do.

            Ron was kissing Lena, I saw them kiss, his eyes closed, the end of my world.

            I had come to realize it too late.




All images and stories on this website are all copyright © 2005 Against Studios. All other images, logos, products, and names are copyright of their respective parties. Against Studios and Against are copyright © 2000-2005 Tom Lin.